I keep wanting to scream out that it's not fair. Why is my kid being denied knowing her grandma. It is, in my humble opinion, grandparents that help to define who we are, where we came from, and what we believe. Sure, parents do the grunt work of making sure we stay alive throughout the perils of childhood, but it is the grandparents that help define our spiritual growth.
Parents can be a little crazy. They are rash, hot-headed, prone to irrational acts, and after having a baby for five months, I can completely understand why!!! But grandparents are different. They're calmer, wiser, gentler. They've seen hardships we can only read about in books. They've had adventures in far-off lands. They tell you bedtime stories about the fox with no tail - at least my grandpa did :)
It was an excitement about having Emma interacting with her grandparents that really made losing Cheryl's mom hard. Sure, there was plenty of selfishness involved. I want to see her. I miss her. I may have teased her, but I really loved her. But it was my desire for my daughter to learn from the experiences of all her grandparents that really hit me hard.
How do you get over something like this? I'm not sure I ever can. At the funeral, I was a pall bearer and I delivered the eulogy. It helped to do something, but it still hurts. In October, we did a breast cancer walk in Fresno. Little Emma was with us. We hope to do this every year in memory of Mrs. B.
We'll miss you!
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